Mommy Guilt

Okay maybe I should have titled this blog post “The Curse of the Cavity” (you will understand if you just keep reading). I swear my kids can never catch a break with health issues. Yes, I am sooooo thankful that it is small issues. I know that it could be much worse. Trust me, I pray every night that their issues are minor and not life threatening. But man poor Ben. How come one kid gets so much thrown on him? And why does it all have to happen to the kid that can’t handle anything medical?

Ben was born with speckled lentigenous nevis (what??). Basically it’s a cluster of moles/freckles that form within one large mole. Well his large mole just happens to take up 80% of his right arm. So instead of all of those moles forming in one small mole, they now form all over his arm. He’s great about it and never complains, it’s just a part of him.  Right now it is all cosmetic but he has to get it checked yearly (oh wait now its every 6 months at his new doctor) to make sure nothing turns cancerous because you know it runs in the family (he can thank me for that one).

Here’s a picture. You can see how right above his hand the arm is darker all of the way up to slightly above his elbow. What you can’t see is that there’s about 100 freckles/moles in that space.


The kid also has a small cataract and vision issues and needs glasses. I was so worried about them but he looks so damn cute in glasses and I love them. He hates sports goggles but we are working on it. It’s been a process but I can’t imagine him without those cute specs on his face


Photo Credit: Photography by Jen Davis

Oh and did I mention that the kid also has epilepsy? Yeah throw that one in there too.


The poor kid just can’t catch a break.

We have been going to the dentist for years but he has never cooperated enough for a real cleaning. So after switching dentists last year I knew that if they didn’t change we would have to consider laughing gas just for a regular cleaning. Thankfully last year he did great and I thought that we were over the hump. I was wrong. Very, very wrong.  I knew going to the dentist today was going to be rough. I noticed one of his molars was turning a shade of gray.  Which is never a good sign.

Both boys had appointments today but I wasn’t worried about Sean. He has great teeth, but I guess that I should have been worried. Ben doesn’t do medical stuff so it was a struggle just to get through the cleaning and the sealants on the molars. I had to stay with him the entire time calming him down. Thankfully Sean didn’t need me and breezed right through the appointment. Once both boys were done and I finally talked to the dentist, I thought that I was about to pass out from the final report. 6 cavities between the two of them. Sean had 4 and Ben had 2. What the hell????? I’m the one that brushes their teeth so I feel like I’ve let them down and failed them. I never let them do it on their own because they are young and I don’t trust their brushing. Well one of them is horrible at it and the other isn’t too bad. Well I guess that I am bad at brushing their teeth too. Or it could be the candy? Or that they refuse to floss? But I feel like I need to take the blame this time around. Mom guilt 100%

So now I have to figure out how to get Ben into that dentist chair next week for his fillings. Mommy and Daddy are definitely spending the extra dough for some laughing gas for that one.

Oh and Sean with 4?? What? He has the cutest, tiniest and whitest teeth on earth. He’s a great brusher and he has so much space in between his teeth that I never expected cavities. But I guess those pesky new molars are collecting all of his food. Which is surprising to me since he barely eats because of his ADHD meds.


What a day. Thank goodness I have some wine left and my mom was here to help and to buy us all Chick-Fil-A after that bad report. After the appointments I just couldn’t concentrate because I felt horrible for them. Especially Ben because it’s just one more trauma that I have to put this kid through.

But like I said in the beginning it could be much worse and I am so thankful that it’s only a few cavities but man can the kid just catch a break please!!!!! Oh and because of our dental plan it’s going to cost a small fortune for these cavities. Add in the laughing gas and whew it’s overwhelming. I wonder if I can pay to get some of that gas too!!!??? Back when I was a kid I never had gas to get through cavities. I dealt with the needle.  These kids have the life! Laughing gas and simple flouride treatments. They don’t even have to suffer through the duck mask of the fluoride treatments. It’s so much simpler these days.

So I guess that our future will be filled with floss, brushing 20 times a day and less sweets!!! Oh and I wonder what the dentist will have to say about this kids teeth next month. I’m afraid to find out. He’s the one with the sweet tooth.

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